Our Listeners Ask: Your Top Wedding Questions, Unpacked

Kevin Dennis (: 00:01

All right, folks, welcome to another episode of Now That I'm Engaged, How Do I Get Married? The question edition. So August and I are here to answer the questions. So we want to thank all of you for submitting questions into the podcast so we could sit here and answer all your wonderful wedding questions and hopefully help you get started on your wonderful planning and wedding day. How are we doing, August?

August Yocher (: 00:23

Doing good. I'm excited that we're back for this segment again. Excited that we have some more questions to answer and there's some some toughies in there. So I'm glad you guys sent those in and I'm excited to tackle those.

Kevin Dennis (: 00:38

I don't know if we want to tackle the tough one. No, I'm just using we're ready to tack. We're ready to tackle them all Yes, yes, yes boss. All right. So here we go. We're gonna jump right in wait before we get started I want to remind you if you'd like to submit your questions, please do so by submitting your questions to podcast at fantasy sound calm Simply send it over an email and August and I will tackle them. All right, so

August Yocher (: 00:41

That is what we're here for Kevin, we must.

Kevin Dennis (: 01:04

All right, we're going to jump right in. So, Raylan sent a question. There are so many different wedding styles. How do I choose just one?

August Yocher (: 01:14

All right. Well, let me think about this for a second. I think from the education we have received from having so many wonderful guests on this podcast, one common theme that I've heard from this type of question before, whether that's like decor or when we recently had Katie on talking about wedding style. And I think Ginger from the Flower House had mentioned this before too, is trying to choose color and style.

that sort of matches what you would reflect in your everyday life, right? So whether that's, you know, maybe you really like pinks and whites, then you're probably really going to enjoy pinks and whites on your wedding day. And not to say that's the same for everyone. Some people, the people that I'm referring to, probably don't have a problem and don't need this question answered, but some people do have a very...

clear vision on what they want for the day. So those people don't necessarily need help on this. But I think you want to pick colors that are going to make you happy. Pick a style that, you know, may be considered timeless and something that you're still going to love 20 years from now. ⁓ I know when I eventually get married, I'm a big green gal, hence, you know, my green headphones here. But ⁓ I definitely know I'm going to want to see some green and

boho type stuff, because that's kind of what I reflect in my everyday life. But what do you think, Kevin? What's your take on that?

Kevin Dennis (: 02:43

That's funny. Well, I

think a little bit of it, too, is going to depend on the venue where you're getting married. That'll help sometimes do that. Another thing to think about is, you know, Pinterest is your friend in this one because you can start making Pinterest boards based on different colors and throwing stuff together. And you're going to go through there and you're going to be like, I really like that. I don't like that. You know, so you're going to find out what you like, you know, and or you're going to do what's in trend. You know, like when my wife and I got married.

August Yocher (: 02:49

True.

Yeah.

Kevin Dennis (: 03:12

brown tuxedos were all their age at the time. And so I was like, I really want one because it was different. And we did it. And now looking back, it looks silly in my opinion, but it is what it is. So no, I laugh. In my head, I giggle because I was like, I shouldn't have done that. But we did. Because we got married on New Year's Eve. We should have kept it more black and white. But anyway, it is what. Yeah.

August Yocher (: 03:25

sure it's still something you look back on fondly. Like, I'm sure you'll you enjoy it still, right?

Yeah.

or sparkly. Yeah.

Kevin Dennis (: 03:40

See?

See? There's so many. It's funny because I think that happens. But OK, so that's a good point too to breaking up. So once you do choose your style or colors, I always say like how the horse has blinders on, you got to put on your blinders and truck forward because you can't be changing and going, you know, all kinds of different colors. But before you know it, you'll have like a mismatch and it'll be you'll have a mess going on.

August Yocher (: 03:43

interpretations.

Mm-hmm.

It won't be

cohesive. Yeah, everything won't flow right. And I do think this is one of those times where if you do have a planner or a designer, or if you don't, maybe hire one, this is where you can lean on them for that because they are professionals. They've done this hundreds of times and they'll definitely know how to steer you in the right direction, know what questions to ask you to get that vision out of you. So that way they can execute it on the big day.

Kevin Dennis (: 04:06

No.

Mm-hmm.

Yep. All right. Well, good luck, Rae-Lynn. All right. We're going to move on to Camden has a question. Planning my wedding is starting to feel like a full-time job. Any tips to avoid burnout?

elope, elope, that'd be my tip.

August Yocher (: 04:53

You know, I mean, it's, I know wedding planning is, it's not for everyone. It definitely is a full-time job for sure. I might steal...

Kevin Dennis (: 05:02

Well, hiring

a planner would help alleviate some of that stress. So you're putting that stress onto someone else. If you can't afford a planner, maybe asking, you know, like a family member or someone that may have a little bit more time that you trust to help you.

Your thoughts?

August Yocher (: 05:22

Yeah, I

mean, don't feel like you have to take it all on. And I think this question is probably more so for the type A people who want to feel very in control over every single little decision. But then you get that decision fatigue that we reference so often. ⁓ But I think, yeah, leaning on your vendors is definitely something that will help you if you're struggling with something. They have all the answers. Just...

Just don't be afraid to ask. And I think at the end of the day too is don't put so much pressure on yourself or the planning in general. And I don't want this to come off in an insensitive way, but I don't feel like it's that deep. At the end of the day, I don't think you're going to look, you wanna look back on this.

Kevin Dennis (: 06:11

Yeah.

August Yocher (: 06:18

this time fondly, right, in a good way. And you don't want it to think about it being so stressful. I think, you know, Meg had talked about that on the one podcast we had where we had a newlywed bride come on and kind of share her experience. And she talked about just making a decision, not to dwell on each individual decision so much to the point where you're just becoming this ball of stress. Just make a decision that you're happy with.

and move on to the next thing. Because there are going to be a lot of decisions and there is going to be a lot that you're going to have to tackle and just kind of, you know, taking baby steps one thing at a time and leaning on those people that will support you.

Kevin Dennis (: 07:02

Yep. And another thing too you can consider is I'm big on time blocking. block time of the week or a couple times during out the week that you're going to work on it. And that might help you not get burnout because you're like, right, on Tuesdays between 7 and 10 at night, we're going to work on the wedding. You just block out time. then that way, once that time hits, you could shut it off for a little bit and then go back to it.

So that would be a good thing too. The other thing too is I'm a big believer in this. You guys need to go out on dates. You need to date each other still. remember, remember, remember to do that. ⁓

August Yocher (: 07:34

Mm-hmm.

want to go back to the time block thing for a second because we just had a couple that we helped coordinate and DJ last weekend and they were so kind to send over all of their planning documents to us and definitely one of the most organized couples I have seen in a very long time but they didn't time block by having a set day of the week. They essentially took the time where they booked their venue

and laid out all of the months until their wedding day and just separated into each month a few tasks at a time. So you're not becoming overwhelmed. It's like, okay, June is designated for these things. July is designated for those. And then you can see all of it's on there and you're not forgetting anything. It's all on the planning document and you just know that I only have to tackle these three things this month and that is it.

Maybe you just get them done early so you don't have to worry about it and just enjoy the rest of your month and know you don't have to do the next thing until next month. So I really liked the way that they had planned that out as well.

Kevin Dennis (: 08:49

Yeah, and that's, mean, in my side life, I'm a certified wedding planner. And that's one of the things that we were taught in that class is that same approach. You take everything down, you break it down, you know, because every couple is going to be different. Some of them are going to have a six month, you know, engagement. Some of them are going to have an 18 month engagement. So obviously, those with longer engagements are going to have more time to prepare for the wedding than those that are having, you know, four or five, six months to prepare. So.

With that said, you're probably going to get little stressed out and burned out doing it on the shorter side. consider longer engagements. That'll help. But also, to Augustus' point, it's taking it down task by task, month by month. And then that's a good way to avoid burnout as well. All right, Camden, hopefully we're able to answer your question as well. All right, you ready for the next one? All right, Angie wrote in, we're trying to decide between an after party or a

August Yocher (: 09:39

Yes.

Kevin Dennis (: 09:46

post-wedding brunch for our close family and friends. Do you have any advice on which might be the better choice? That's a one.

August Yocher (: 09:55

Hmm. I feel like...

Yeah, I was gonna say, do you want to take that one first?

Kevin Dennis (: 10:00

Yeah, I'll

start because I well I just from someone that has been married and been through the whole process you're exhausted at the end and Unless you hit get an adrenaline rush the after party because I remember our whole family Set up their own after party because we again got married on New Year's Eve So it was really difficult to set up an after party for them So at the hotel that everyone was staying at we walked into the hotel and they had their own little party going on

August Yocher (: 10:09

Yeah.

Mmm.

Kevin Dennis (: 10:30

And my wife and I looked at each other. We're like, hey guys, good to see you. We're done. You know, like we were exhausted and we went back to the room, you know, and we were just exhausted from the day. So if I were to plan it for my wedding, looking back at what I did, I would have planned the post wedding brunch because I would have been able to get a little sleep. And, know, like we, you know, there's some couples that you hear are starting hair and makeup at like 4 a.m., you know, and they're getting ready and things are going. So by the time

August Yocher (: 10:47

Yeah.

Kevin Dennis (: 11:00

11 o'clock rolls around they're exhausted. It's a long day. But I will say that I had ⁓ a couple ⁓ He was Indian. She was ⁓ Mexican and so they did an Indian ceremony in the morning had a lunch took a break did a western ceremony in the evening and then went till 11 o'clock same thing she started at four in the morning and Then what was crazy is that at 11 o'clock? She was just like

August Yocher (: 11:03

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Kevin Dennis (: 11:29

I think it was almost that adrenaline rush that the whole day was over. She was on such a high that she was just like, ⁓ it's done, we did it. She had that feeling of accomplishment. anyway, was... yeah. anyway.

August Yocher (: 11:41

Ready to hit the hay after that.

guess

my take would be you have to... I guess it depends on the couple, right? And I know that's obviously the obvious answer. But are you someone that is going to want to do that? And I will say, speaking from experience, I did attend a wedding a couple years ago in slow and it was so much fun. ⁓ And I believe the wedding ended at 10 o'clock, but they had told us in advance that they were

planning to do an after party in downtown slow. And honestly, after the wedding, I was still ready to keep going. And we did, we went to the downtown slow and we went to a bar and we danced and her aunt was so nice and got everybody bottle service. It was a great time, you know, and we only stayed for maybe like an hour or two. So it wasn't that much longer than, you know, the wedding itself, but it was, it was a lot of fun.

⁓ But I also totally understand like you just hit the finish line and obviously so many months, sometimes years leading up to this moment and now you can finally relax. I would probably just want to go to bed too and get a good night's sleep and just kind of reminisce in the morning, right? That post-brunch you get to talk about all the memories you made the day before and just kind of thank everyone for being there and I feel like that would be really fun too.

Kevin Dennis (: 13:13

Well, and it's funny that you say that. So looking back, that wedding ended at 10. So, you know, lot of it determines what time your wedding ends, because my wedding ended at 1230 at night. You know, so you know. Yeah.

August Yocher (: 13:22

Yeah, but it's also a holiday. So people

kind of stay up super late. Like I think last New Year's I stayed up till 4 a.m. You know, so it just I'm just saying like it just depends on the person and are you like party people or not? And do you have a lot of family from out of town? Because maybe if there's family from out of town that post brunch would be really nice to just host one last time together with with family and close friends and wedding parties. So.

Kevin Dennis (: 13:30

Damn, girl!

August Yocher (: 13:49

I think everyone's situation is different, so you just need to kind of analyze what would work best for you.

Kevin Dennis (: 13:49

Yeah.

Well, and think thinking back to is what's the age of your crowd? know, so what? Yeah, I think that'll determine it. So there's so many different things to think about there. So all right. Well, I hope we helped you out there, Angie. All right, we're moving on to the next one. Luis wrote in and we're trying to decide if we should go for an open bar at our wedding. How does it usually work and is it worth splurging? So what do you think, girl?

August Yocher (: 13:59

Yeah, totally.

Yeah.

Okay, so I guess I would approach, I guess there's a couple different questions within this question, but I guess deciding to do an open bar, this kind of goes back to the last question, but you know your crowd best, right? And I've been to weddings where it has been an open bar. I've also been to weddings where it's dry. I've been to weddings where it's just beer and wine, but it's just kind of looking at your crowd and deciding, is this a priority for me?

And is it worth the money that I'm going to be spending on it? Because I think when couples start out their planning journey, you guys should sit down, talk to your partner, figure out obviously what the priorities are and what you're putting more into versus not. And if Open Bar is very important to you, go ahead and do it. But if you're OK with just the beer and wine, that's fine, too. I think it's also taking a look at what your venue allows, right? So some...

venues, one that we work with a lot has an open bar package built into the venue package itself. So in that case, it's not really a decision you have to make, it's already going to be available to you. Whereas others, you have to bring in an outside team and sometimes that team has restrictions as far as, is liquor allowed or is it only beer and wine? And are there restrictions as far as like who can serve it?

if it's available at the table. So I think it's looking at your contracts with your vendors too and making sure that you're taking all the appropriate steps.

Kevin Dennis (: 15:58

Yeah, and like you brought up so many questions like I was thinking when you were going through but Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's like yeah. Good. Good point. Good point. Good point but I think one of the things to think about too when it comes to the open bar is like is You know your guests that you're inviting Are they drinkers or not if they're not big drinkers then maybe it's not worth the splurge of doing it or maybe you know It's you just host beer and wine and if they want, you know cocktails that that is

August Yocher (: 16:03

like boom boom boom boom. Yeah. ⁓

Mm-hmm.

Kevin Dennis (: 16:28

paid. So there's a bunch of different routes you can go with it. I do, though, think that it's getting more more custom to go to a wedding, that people are expecting to have that hosted. They're not expecting to bring cash tips and all that other stuff to take care of it. They're usually expecting it to be hosted.

All right.

August Yocher (: 16:49

Yeah,

I would say that too. And we always reference guest experience, so definitely, like Kevin said, take a look at who your guests are, what's going to be the best night for them, and decide accordingly.

Kevin Dennis (: 17:05

All right, well, all right, Luis, I hope we were able to answer your question. All right, Suzy wrote in a good question, which I think is going to be we're going to have fun with. I'm wondering if it's OK to ask guests to wear a specific color to the wedding. Is that something that's typically done or does it come across to controlling?

August Yocher (: 17:24

Mm-hmm. I think we've touched on this, like, a few times in other podcasts, and I think you had briefly touched on it during the Bride Shilla podcast recently did with Megan Ealy and Leah, but I think there is a right way to do this and there's a wrong way to do this. And you have to first think about that...

People may already be taking time off work to go to your wedding. They may be having to get a babysitter for the kids. They're potentially spending money to travel. And it is a lot to ask someone to purchase an outfit for a wedding that they may not already have in their closet. ⁓ I went to a wedding recently where they did, it was sort of like a dress code. They had a theme, but they also kind of gave a variety of colors.

Kevin Dennis (: 18:19

Mmm.

August Yocher (: 18:19

for

you to wear. So in that case, I didn't really think much of it because they gave probably like five or six different colors that you could wear that, you know, most people would most likely have in their closet already. And it was a speakeasy theme. So I thought that was a really nice way to approach it. I think it is hard to ask like a very specific color, like everyone wear, you know, baby blue, and this is the only thing you're allowed to wear. That...

feels interesting to me, but I think there's a way to approach it as long as you're being sensitive to your guests and what might be comfortable for them.

Kevin Dennis (: 19:03

Yeah, I've done like over the years, like we went to a Halloween themed wedding, you know, so everyone they were encouraged to wear costume. ⁓ Yeah, you know, I've done it where there was black tie, you know, which is very common on the East Coast to have a black tie. You know, it's almost like it's a custom that you you know, you wear a black tie to a wedding on the East Coast. ⁓ You know, so but I also think it's kind of fun. And I think people sometimes

August Yocher (: 19:12

my gosh.

Yeah.

Kevin Dennis (: 19:32

Nowadays we're getting more and more in the habit of being told what to wear like, know August and I are getting ready to go to the NACE conference and We were talking about it earlier today. I'm like, hey, there's gonna be a Pinterest board That's gonna help us plan what to wear for the gala and for you know, all the different parties and you know So it just so I think it's people enjoy, you know, I think there's people I hate dressing up for Halloween. It's not my thing I just never never never like it

August Yocher (: 19:57

⁓ I have like three

costumes every year. I love, I love a theme, absolutely.

Kevin Dennis (: 20:01

Yeah. So, you

know, but then, but I, but it's funny because I don't mind, I enjoy dressing up for events. Yeah. You know, like if whatever the event is, I enjoy doing that part as well. So I think, you know, I think it once again goes back to guest experience, look at your guests. I think if, you know, if you are, you know, where your venue is at. So if you're asking them to where, you know, like

August Yocher (: 20:09

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Kevin Dennis (: 20:27

something that isn't appropriate for the venue, then they might get irritated. But I also think it's kind of fun is, like even if you're telling them that what you're trying to achieve, we're trying for our photos, we want our photos to have this really cool ombre look of all the different colors of blue or whatever it is. And so therefore, you might be trying to achieve something in there as well. So I think it'd be kind of fun. I personally would be down for it.

August Yocher (: 20:56

same like and I think there's just a balance too but don't get me wrong I love a good theme I mean even my friends in my everyday life we will just have a regular small party on a Friday night but we want it to be themed so everyone will just dress up for the hell of it so ⁓ you know not to say that people won't I think it's just making sure you put the appropriate boundaries so that your guests aren't spending you know huge amounts of money on the wardrobe for the event.

Kevin Dennis (: 21:25

And I think to answer Susie's question, I think it is OK. So. Yep. All right. Clara wrote, we're trying to figure out who should be in charge of hosting the pre-wedding events, like the rehearsal dinner or bridal showers. Is that something we do or usually a friend or a family member? Who takes it on?

August Yocher (: 21:30

Yes, it is okay. Yes.

Well, I think in this case, I don't think there is someone specific. I think it is the people you will point and trust, but I do think it is a very good idea to pass that off to someone to help you with because you're already dealing with so much. The planning process is very stressful. So, know, delegating and handing those tasks off to either your maid of honor, your best man.

Kevin Dennis (: 22:07

Mm-hmm.

August Yocher (: 22:20

⁓ mother, father, ⁓ siblings, I think is all very helpful because it's just a lot. So I think any one of those people would be great to pass off because you've kind of put them, you've asked them to assist, right, by asking them to participate in the wedding and I'm sure they would be more than happy to help you out with that.

Kevin Dennis (: 22:44

Well, tradition, the maid of honor or a family, you know, sister or whoever would host the bridal showers, usually ⁓ family members, know, parents are the ones that usually host the engagement parties, you know, and then it's usually the parents of the groom are the ones that do the rehearsal dinner. So, but I mean, that's usually that's kind of the tradition. But again, weddings are becoming more more non-traditional. So.

August Yocher (: 22:58

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

You do you.

Kevin Dennis (: 23:15

Yeah, you do you, man.

All right, Clara. I hope we got your question answered. All right. So Sophia, I've seen a lot of couples ask guests to put their phones away during the ceremony or reception. Is it OK ⁓ to request that? I'd love to hear your thoughts. Sophia.

August Yocher (: 23:41

Yes, I mean just generally yes, but this one's fun because I think couples have really taken this and ran with it and now I've just seen so many variations of the way that they ask us to put phones away and I think my favorite one I've seen so far is typically like the officiant or your DJ perhaps ⁓ would make an announcement before the wedding party comes down.

And I've also seen it where we have everyone at the front, right? And bride and groom are about to get into position and the officiant will address all the guests sitting down and say, okay, we're going to put our phones away now. But before you do, I'm giving you all 30 seconds to take as many photos of you want of the ceremony. And then I don't want to see them again. And I thought that was really cute. You know, or I've seen couples take their phone out and take a selfie.

you know, with the entire wedding in the back. And I think that's really cute as well. So there's a lot of ways to approach it in a sensitive way. And of course, signage is great, too. Just that initial reminder as guests are sitting down. But obviously, you're paying a lot of money for this wedding, a lot of money for your professional photographer team to come in and take photos. So it is absolutely fine to ask guests to put those phones away. They can do without them for a few minutes.

Kevin Dennis (: 25:08

Yeah, and I agree with you that and it's becoming more and more common at weddings now For those announcements to be made. I just saw one that I love that I'm gonna start encouraging my couples to do is that The efficient again or the DJ makes the announcement pre ceremony Before it starts and then they tell everyone. Alright folks today's wedding is gonna be you know, so cell phone free

So we're going to ask everyone to put away their cell phones for the wedding. before you do, we're encouraging the bride and groom would love it if you would take selfies of the person you're sitting next to or a group of people that you're sitting next to and text it to them. Text the bride and groom, the photos. Yeah. And then that's another just like kind of simple like how you had that 30 seconds of everyone being able to do it. All right. Everyone do it. Whoever's orchestrating it. OK.

August Yocher (: 25:49

⁓ Wait, right that minute? That's so cute.

Mm-hmm.

Kevin Dennis (: 26:03

Now you guys have done it, now please put the phones away. Because I can't tell you how many times I've been to a wedding and you hear dun dun dun dun dun dun dun, you know, like the ringer going off or whatever it is, you know, and so it just, and you know, you don't want to be that one person in the crowd too, so you always, I'm a big believer on silent on your phone. I keep mine in silence pretty much 24 seven. But anyway, so.

August Yocher (: 26:26

And don't stick

your friggin hand out in the aisle, Why? I just, at this day and age, come on, guys.

Kevin Dennis (: 26:29

⁓ yeah.

But I have

seen, I will say on the flip side, have seen photographers embrace that when that happens and use that as a prop to get like a cool photo. Yeah, yep, yep. So there's, yeah, there's always, and then there's always that one ant, and I don't know if it's an ant, but it's always that one ant, which I feel it always looks like an ant to me, that refuses, that just flat out refuses to put the phone away. But I think,

August Yocher (: 26:41

Oh, from behind. Yeah. Yeah.

It probably is.

Kevin Dennis (: 26:59

If you do something cute like what August talked about or what I talked about, ⁓ doing something fun pre-ceremony, it gets a giggle out of the group, and I think it gets more buy-in from your guests.

August Yocher (: 27:12

Yeah, like

deescalates the situation.

Kevin Dennis (: 27:15

Well, yeah,

because instead of saying, is cell phone free. if you come out kind of, yeah, I think you get less buying. But if you do something kind of humorous or lighthearted on the front end, kind of like what you said there, and then boom, go. But I really like the one that I just saw. Right? Because.

August Yocher (: 27:21

Yeah, you have to do this.

Mm-hmm. The text one, I love that. And then the couple

can just spend like five minutes just scrolling through the photos and seeing everyone all excited to watch them walk out. Like how adorable is that?

Kevin Dennis (: 27:43

Right?

I think,

yeah, I almost think you can make a cool social media clip out of that. That would be, yeah, yeah, I love that one. So Sophia, hopefully we got your answer question answered. I can't speak. We're getting there. All right, well, I think we're getting there because we're getting to the last question here. All right, so we're running into some capacity limits at our venue and might need to cut a few names from our guest list. How should we handle?

August Yocher (: 27:50

my god, yes, absolutely.

There you go.

All right, all right.

Mmm.

Kevin Dennis (: 28:14

this with our guests without causing any drama. That was Lucas's question. Thank you, Lucas, for sending it in. That's a tough one. So I think you throw everyone in and you play lottery and you start pulling out names. And I think you broadcast it live so where everyone can what? No, I think you put ping pong balls and with every guest name on it it's almost like the NBA and it pops out and

August Yocher (: 28:31

We can make a big wheel and just spin it, you know?

Kevin Dennis (: 28:43

Suzy gets to come and no Jane gets to, you know what? No, I think a lot of it starts coming with, ⁓ you know, some people eliminate plus ones. So sometimes you, you know, if you're running into some capacity limits, I also think if you're limiting people and get, you know, cutting plus ones ⁓ or kids, like that's another thing that you can cut. That wedding we just did on last Saturday, they did have a lot of kids. So if they would have in there.

August Yocher (: 28:45

⁓ my.

Yeah.

22.

Kevin Dennis (: 29:12

Yeah, and their guest count was 260. Or whatever, yeah. So it would have dropped a whole lot of tables, you know, like if they got rid of the kids. I think it's, you know, so that's one of the options to do, you know, getting rid of the kids, getting rid of the plus ones. And then from there, you know, if you don't see someone and talk to someone a lot, you know, maybe they shouldn't be invited to your wedding. This is always, this is the hardest part is this and the damn.

August Yocher (: 29:15

256 or something along those lines.

Mm-hmm.

Kevin Dennis (: 29:42

RSVPs of a wedding is figuring out who's gonna come and then when you know like August are you coming to my wedding or not? And do you want beef or chicken? You know like it's just like because you got to start getting all that information into the caterer and all that kind of different stuff But I really feel this is a tough one But I think you start you know if you don't see someone if you don't see you know and all the time Or you haven't seen her in the last five years. Maybe she doesn't get invited. You know so you start just eliminating people

August Yocher (: 29:42

Yeah.

Kevin Dennis (: 30:10

You know, like who do you want to be there to celebrate your love? And that's, think, the biggest thing you got to remember. if Anda is the grumpy one that's going to hold her cell phone out and not put it away and going to be up requesting weird music to the DJ and complaining about everything, then maybe she just doesn't get invited to the wedding.

August Yocher (: 30:30

Yeah. No, think the I mean, I know you said five years, but I even think one or two years, you know, just depending on how often you see family and have they met your partner too? Because I feel like that happens a lot where, you know, family's invited and this is the first time they're meeting their partner. Like, have they been involved in your love story? Have they have they supported you? Have they been there through your journey? ⁓

Kevin Dennis (: 30:42

Oooh!

August Yocher (: 30:57

I think it's the people that know you both and support you both and have wanted to get to know you over the last few years are the people that you really want to be there to celebrate.

Kevin Dennis (: 31:08

Yeah, especially too because you may not see your family all the time and your friends may be your family, you know, and everybody's family dynamic is so different that it's, you know, I don't think, you know, again, that's a weddings are becoming non-traditional, you know, so that's, I think a tradition that you can look at and just be like, you know, you don't have to invite or, you know, the other thing I think couples run into too is if I invite this one, I have to invite five others, you know, the go, you know, like

August Yocher (: 31:14

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Hmm.

Kevin Dennis (: 31:35

That's a whole other topic. It's the worst, August when you get married, I don't envy you. It's the worst. It's really one of the worst parts you go through.

August Yocher (: 31:41

No, I get that.

Yeah, because I mean, I've even just like planning a party at my house. I'm like, it's the same way though, Kevin, like, if I invite so and so, that means I have to invite so and so, so and so, so and so or feelings will be hurt. They're like a package deal and they're just opening this this huge can of worms. So yeah, definitely tread lightly. But I feel like everyone in their mind, they already have their ABC lists and they know.

Kevin Dennis (: 31:53

I know. ⁓

August Yocher (: 32:08

who's the priority and who really needs to be there versus, you know, this person. Yeah, we could probably cut.

Kevin Dennis (: 32:16

And there are people that you're going to invite that are just courtesy invites that are not going to come. Like Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce. You may invite them, but they're not going to come.

August Yocher (: 32:22

Yeah.

Yeah, because what's the

percentage? Like 20, 30 % of the people you invite probably will RSVP know.

Kevin Dennis (: 32:32

It's yeah,

yeah, but and then when I got married it was a big deal to invite the president, know, and you send out these invites to people that you know.

August Yocher (: 32:41

Well, now

it's like inviting brands. Like you'll do like Chick-fil-A or Starbucks or Target and you'll just like send them invites because, and I've seen it on TikTok, they're like, here are the brands you can send a wedding invite to and they'll send you back like a package with like goodies and stuff that you can use the day of. inviting a celebrity once in a while because I mean,

Kevin Dennis (: 32:44

Celebrate, yeah. Yes.

August Yocher (: 33:10

To be fair, they show up at stuff sometimes. Like, they'll just, like, a little PR stunt, they'll just show up at a wedding. So, I know our girl Kelsey invited, you know, Mr. Harry Styles just in case, you know, so. He didn't show, but.

Kevin Dennis (: 33:26

I was gonna ask. And also, as we wrap up, was gonna let all the listeners know that I've not been invited to one of August's parties yet, so I'm still waiting for my invite on that one.

August Yocher (: 33:36

⁓ I see. Well,

I'm homeless right now, so...

Kevin Dennis (: 33:40

Yeah.

⁓

August Yocher (: 33:43

We'll get to it, we'll get to it eventually.

Kevin Dennis (: 33:46

All right. All right. Well, thank you for sending in your questions, folks. If please send in more questions to podcast at fantasy sound.com and August and I will be happy to get in there, tackle these questions because we're here to help you. That's what we're about at now that I'm engaged. How do I get married? So folks, thank you for tuning in and we'll see you next time.

August Yocher (: 34:07

See you next time!

Kevin Dennis (: 34:08

Bye!