Why Your Wedding Officiant Matters More Than You Think | Chris Thielen
A lot of couples think having a friend or family member officiate their wedding is a great idea—until the big day turns into a total disaster. From awkward silences to forgotten lines, things can go off the rails fast. That’s why we’re bringing in Chris Thielen, an experienced wedding officiant, to talk about what actually makes a ceremony special and how to avoid a cringe-worthy moment at the altar.
When it comes to wedding planning, most couples focus on the venue, the dress, and the party—but what about the ceremony itself? The person officiating your wedding plays a much bigger role than you might think. Chris Thielen has been officiating weddings for over 25 years, and he’s seen it all. From flawless, heartfelt ceremonies to absolute train wrecks, he knows what makes a wedding day run smoothly and what can turn it into an unforgettable (for the wrong reasons) experience.
Chris explains why hiring a professional officiant is worth it, especially when compared to having a friend or family member handle the ceremony. While it may seem like a sweet, personal touch, it often leads to stress, forgotten lines, and uncomfortable moments. He shares his best tips for making sure your ceremony reflects your personality and doesn’t feel like a generic script being read off a piece of paper.
We also dive into what an officiant actually does, from helping you with your marriage license to making sure the ceremony runs seamlessly. Chris shares the most common mistakes couples make when planning their wedding and how to avoid unnecessary stress leading up to the big day.
Plus, if you think the ceremony is just a short moment before the party starts, Chris might just change your mind. A well-done ceremony isn’t just about making it legal—it’s about setting the tone for the entire day and making sure your guests feel just as connected to your story as you do.
Episode Highlights:
- The biggest mistakes couples make when choosing an officiant
- Why asking a friend or family member to officiate can be risky
- How to make sure your ceremony feels personal and engaging
- The little details most couples forget that can lead to awkward moments
- Why your officiant needs to be comfortable speaking in front of a crowd
- The importance of working with vendors who understand your vision
Got a wedding planning question? We’d love to help! Send us your biggest wedding dilemmas, and we might answer them on a future episode. Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review the podcast—plus, share this episode with someone who’s in the middle of wedding planning!
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Transcript
Kevin Dennis (0:0.783)
All right, welcome to another episode. And now that I'm engaged, how do I get married? We have the one and only Chris Thielen. if you don't know, Chris is an amazing officiant. But Chris is also a huge baseball fan. we were talking of obviously we were joking that we could have a whole sports episode and bring it to the wedding, folks. But we will not do that, right, Chris? will. Yeah. August put her foot down and said no, but.
Chris Thielen (0:7.198)
you
Chris Thielen (0:20.734)
It will spare you, yeah.
August Yocher (0:21.006)
Because August said no.
Kevin Dennis (0:26.097)
Today, Chris is here talking about why a wedding efficient matters more than you think, especially since a lot of people have their friends marry them and it usually is, for lack of a better word, a shit show. So anyway, so we have a professional here to tell us all about it. But Chris, before we do that, tell us a little bit about you and how we got Chris here today.
Chris Thielen (0:46.696)
Yeah, well, nice to meet everybody. It's great to be here and I'm a Bay Area guy. I grew up in Hayward and lived in Livermore for a long time and currently live in Tracy. And I've known Kevin for years and I've known his family for a long time and we've been friends. So we have been known before a wedding to chit chat about baseball as we're setting up mics and stuff. yeah, so I've been married for 30 plus years. We have a son that's 24 and is also kind of getting into the
wedding video business. He's a film major, graduated college with film and wants to start shooting video. So he's trying to get gigs and, you know, just build a portfolio, that kind of thing. But yeah, I've been doing weddings for a long time, probably 25 years at least. I had done occasionally some before that for friends or whatnot. yeah, I don't know. It kind of started at a Rio Slavelle winery up there on what is it Tesla, you know, in that area. And my wife was getting her hair done and
Kevin Dennis (1:18.567)
Hmm.
August Yocher (1:18.700)
Mmm.
August Yocher (1:30.819)
Wow.
Kevin Dennis (1:40.805)
Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (1:45.630)
The lady doing her hair said, oh, you know, she's planning a wedding and she was there. Her official wasn't calling her back. And my wife said, well, my husband doesn't has done wedding before you want to call it, you know, and so I did it. And, I was like, man, this is really fun, you know, and I just, it's just, it's my favorite thing to do on the weekend. And so I done that I got hooked and just kind of living in Livermore at the time. And so I just kind of started connecting with different wineries and venues and things like that. And, and trying to get on the vendor lists and
Kevin Dennis (1:51.161)
No.
August Yocher (1:51.350)
Oh no!
Chris Thielen (2:14.829)
and meeting with couples and, just kind of, you know, building it up from there. And it is, it's a blast. I love doing it. So it's, it's probably been about 25 years and I usually do about 30 to 35 a year. And so it's, yeah, yeah. So it's not too many, you know, I, it's a, it's a side thing for me, you know? And so, you know, Fridays and Saturdays, it's the favorite thing to do, you know, and even now you guys know, I mean, a lot more during the week, Mondays, Thursdays, things like that. Yeah. Yeah.
August Yocher (2:27.490)
That's a good amount.
Kevin Dennis (2:38.417)
Yeah.
August Yocher (2:42.168)
Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (2:43.045)
It's crazy. The during the week stuff is really insane. And I think that's all a product of COVID. it is, I joke with my friends outside of the Bay Area, you because we are all Bay Area based that we're becoming more and more like Vegas. You know, it's like we have weddings every day of the week and it just, yeah, just. Exactly. I was gonna just ask.
Chris Thielen (2:49.063)
Yeah.
Chris Thielen (2:58.415)
Yeah. Minus the Elvis costume. I haven't done that yet. Yeah. Thank you very much. Right. Yes. Yes, we can we can we can, you know, we can work that in maybe a la carte and something. So. So yeah, I just I love doing it. What's fun for me is that, you know, you do kind of your other job, your regular job, and then you
August Yocher (2:59.744)
That is true, yeah.
August Yocher (3:6.958)
Is that like a tiered package that you have, you know?
Chris Thielen (3:22.407)
you have something on the side, but I love to be able to work with couples, because I always say it's, you know, it's their best day. You know, your wedding is supposed to be your best day. And, and so to be able to walk people through that, and you know, we have experience doing it, you can be able to walk people through and, you know, we've done it so many times that it's easy for us. So being able to put myself into the mind of somebody who's never done it before, or it's been years and years and years, if it's a second marriage, and they just, you know, lot, I always tell them, said, there's a lot of things you don't know that you don't know.
Kevin Dennis (3:28.667)
Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (3:30.179)
Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (3:44.760)
Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (3:51.599)
Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (3:52.392)
So help us, you know, help us walk you through the process. It's simple, but there's a lot of little things, as you know, that can happen that you can mitigate if you kind of can see it coming. And so just being able to walk couples through that and take the stress out of it. I always make everybody pinky swear with me that they're not gonna start. I can worry about your flowers and your food and everything else. Just pinky promise me that you won't stress the ceremony. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
August Yocher (4:17.484)
That's so cute, I like that.
Kevin Dennis (4:17.572)
Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (4:20.561)
I like to tell them, because a typical ceremony is 20 to 25 minutes, and I tell them, said, you guys are up there standing, holding hands, looking at each other. You don't have anything else to do. right. Yeah, I mean, I'm there. I'm whispering instructions to them, that kind of thing. And so, I just say, just turn your brain off and just be in the moment. Because I say, I tell them, you've been up since six in the morning getting makeup done and getting ready and nervous and all that.
August Yocher (4:24.494)
Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (4:31.482)
Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (4:32.556)
or to worry about, you know?
Chris Thielen (4:49.502)
I said, that should be the most relaxed you are all day. That 15, 20 minutes that you're up there by yourselves holding hands. So I try to kind of create that atmosphere with them.
Kevin Dennis (4:52.369)
Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (4:58.981)
And that's good because usually once the reception starts, they're pulled so many different directions and have to say hello and welcome to so many different family and friends. And yeah, that's amazing that you do that. So all right. So give us a quick rundown of what an officiant does on the day of the wedding.
August Yocher (4:59.040)
I love that.
Chris Thielen (5:12.156)
Yeah.
Chris Thielen (5:18.681)
Oh, okay. Yeah, Day of the World. I usually try to make the rehearsal. So most of the time, I like to include that with me just because I want to get to know everybody and meet everybody. And so it is. Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (5:22.811)
Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (5:28.699)
That's a fun time. Like everyone's more relaxed. Yeah, yeah.
August Yocher (5:31.586)
And I will say, the times we worked together, Chris, I was always oh so thankful when you were at the rehearsal, because you just, you got it, man, you know what to do, so.
Kevin Dennis (5:36.590)
Hahaha!
Chris Thielen (5:40.734)
Yeah, it's simple, right? That's what we always say. It's simple, but in some of it's muscle memory. Once we run it through a couple of times, you're gonna know, and I'll joke with a couple, I'll this is like the pre-party, because you've got friends and family and cousins and things like that that haven't come into the rehearsal, if they're in the bridal party. They haven't seen each other for a long time, and so that first 10 minutes even of the rehearsal as we're kind of gathering, it's fun, it's a reunion. So.
Kevin Dennis (5:46.651)
Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (5:52.219)
Hmm.
Chris Thielen (6:7.587)
Yeah, it's very loose. I work with kids and stuff. And so I'm very used to I tell them I'm very used to the chaos of Of it all doesn't bother me at all In fact, I tell couples that you know during the ceremony if you guys when you're there if you want to kind of giggle and whisper the whole time Do it if that's what helps you be in the moment, you know, I said you you don't have to listen to anything I say just watch the video later But if it helps you just to be in the moment and remember everything just do that
August Yocher (6:10.574)
Mm.
Kevin Dennis (6:15.416)
Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (6:26.759)
Hmm.
Chris Thielen (6:36.424)
just enjoy that time and I tell them, I'll let you know when something comes up. So, but yeah, I typically, and you know, Kevin, you've been doing it, you guys have been, August, you've been to enough of, you've seen, you know, the guys are shucking and jiving and goofing around and the girls are all attentive, you know, and they're like, stop, you guys, not gonna, but it's fun, you know? And so that's, the rehearsal is pre-party. And then, yeah, day of the wedding, I get there at least a half hour ahead.
August Yocher (6:46.967)
Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (6:50.821)
Yep. Yeah.
August Yocher (6:51.266)
Always.
Kevin Dennis (6:59.322)
Yeah.
Chris Thielen (7:3.479)
And I'll, you know, check in with you guys. You guys will get me set up with the microphones and things like that. Check in with the venue coordinator, of course, and make sure that everything is set, especially since we, you know, most of the time the day before is a rehearsal. And so the day of I just kind of let the couple do their thing. They're getting ready. If they're, if they've, um, if they're having a first look, they're knocking those pictures out. And, um, so half hour ahead, I think is about good. Cause they're kind of, they've wound that down. Guests are kind of starting to arrive. And so, um,
August Yocher (7:20.226)
Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (7:33.298)
Yeah, well, sometimes, you know, we'll we might sign the license then a little less pressure. I think that's I think that's helpful for your couples that are just kind of getting into it. They'll go through the whole license process. That's part of it. I can, you know, when we do our our meeting beforehand, you know, I'll walk them through that process, but it's got to be just right. And so, you know, it's a little easier, I think, to do before the ceremony. There's less pressure, you know.
Kevin Dennis (7:37.116)
Mmm.
August Yocher (7:37.282)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
August Yocher (7:54.880)
Yeah.
August Yocher (7:59.564)
Yeah, I never thought about doing that because I always did it right after but oh my goodness, it was always so chaotic because you're like, okay, where are the two witnesses? Like, riding groomer off like downing champagne and then there's everyone else just kind of piling into the reception space. So it's just very stressful. And then sometimes, you know, like the the witnesses have had some drinks and you're like, hey, so you can't scratch that out. You have to write it legibly like
Chris Thielen (8:21.681)
Yep.
August Yocher (8:26.830)
please this line. And then a lot of times I would write out too, like, because I was at the venues in Pleasanton, so I would write out the word Pleasanton so that way they wouldn't spell it wrong. And sometimes they would still mess up and I'm like, come on guys.
Chris Thielen (8:39.472)
Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it is one of those things. It has to be right just for your couples to know, you know, it's got to be and just so that they know to remember they don't sign the license at the wedding. So when you go to pick up your license, and it's got to be within a 90 day window before the ceremony, that's important. But when they go and pick it up, they're gonna show ID and sign it at their at the courthouse and the clerk will sign just to kind of verify that it's them. So they'll give you a packet.
Kevin Dennis (8:50.203)
Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (8:50.347)
Right.
August Yocher (8:55.138)
Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (9:6.779)
So yeah, the day of the wedding, really, it's just your witnesses. Yeah, and then I have a part that I fill out. So one of the things with that that I like to do is I offer, because if you're going on a honeymoon right away, the last thing you want to think about is that piece of paper that's got to be in within 10 days. So I tell them, it is, yeah. And so I offer, if they want me to, and most take me up on it, just to take it with me. I bring stamps with me, and I just drop it off at the post office on my way home.
August Yocher (9:9.932)
Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (9:9.953)
Yeah. Yeah.
August Yocher (9:18.424)
Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (9:23.310)
It's kind of a chore too, so yeah.
Kevin Dennis (9:36.228)
Oh, wow.
Chris Thielen (9:36.272)
And that way it goes straight in. Yeah, yeah, that way they can then we take a picture. Sometimes it's good to take on a honeymoon if they've got a picture of a good for a room upgrade or a bottle of champagne or something, you know. But I'll mail it in for them. And that way they know it's they know it's in. So anyway, that's that's the license stuff. But yeah, I mean, day of the wedding, we'll you know, we'll talk a little bit beforehand. I like to go over with the father of the bride, usually if it's the father of the bride that's walking her up, you know,
August Yocher (9:37.408)
Easy peasy.
Kevin Dennis (9:38.694)
Yeah.
Chris Thielen (10:5.733)
You guys have seen it. I know we have a joke, you know that if anything goes sideways, it's the father of the ride. Yeah, and I think that I. True that yes. Yes.
Kevin Dennis (:It usually is, yeah. Or if there's pets, pets can make them go, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Yeah, I'm like don't step on her dress wait for her to walk up that was always a big one too. So
Chris Thielen (:Yes, yeah. And I think what happens is the dads and it's really cute, you know, they're super, they may be a tough guy, but they get sentimental at the wedding, you know, because they picture their daughter like their little girl, you know, again, and everybody's watching is super emotional. And so we just walk that through because you're right, they might inadvertently be stepping on the dress or they, they have, you know, I'll say who gives this woman to be married on this day, and they say her mother and I or something and they can't get that out. So you know, it's cute, but so I'll try to check in with dad.
Kevin Dennis (:Oh, big time, yeah. Yeah.
August Yocher (:Totally.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:and just walk him through it one more time and and and then you know check in with Brian and groom make sure they're good and then a lot of times at that point the venue staff takes over and you know they'll kind of get everybody lined up and yeah when we when we were ready I typically go in first and I like to tell everybody you know please silence your phones you know don't don't hold your phone out in the aisle trying to get a video and block the photographer you know and
August Yocher (11:0.579)
Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Like everyone still does anyway after you make that announcement. Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:I know. Yeah, yeah, it doesn't matter how many times you tell them. But you know, sometimes and that's important, too. I think we need to get instructions from a couple of what they want. You know, some want a totally unplugged service, no phones, you know, they want everybody just to be there in the moment. Others don't mind, you know, and so we just kind of let it go that way. And then, yeah, and then they all walk up and I don't know you guys like, when you're doing the music and you're on the back or the side or something, it's not always you can't see it all the time. But for me,
Kevin Dennis (:Hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
I can't see the view, yeah, yeah.
Chris Thielen (:I love it. I do and I tell you, like, you know, hundreds of times and you just see, like, especially some of the venues where the big doors will open, you know, and it's bride and dad. And the every I'll ask everybody to stand, you know, would you please stand for the bride and everything that's dramatic in itself, you know, and yeah, just the couple of dad and bride coming forward and, and boy, it hits you every time, you know, because it's something, you know. Yeah.
August Yocher (:You got the best view in the house, man!
Kevin Dennis (:You
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (12:5.361)
Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:It does.
August Yocher (:You think it wouldn't after so many times and yeah, the first dance or like the parent dances always get to me too later in the evening and don't know why they just always do.
Chris Thielen (:Right? Right? Right. I did one last summer for some friends. And I've known the bride since she was little, you know, and little Allie and she's walking up and I almost lost it. I was like, Oh, I got to get myself together, you know, because I know, like, I can't lose it here, you know, but it's, it was sweet, you know. Yeah. And then we, you know, as far as the rest of it, they come forward, you know, the giving of the bride part and then the groom steps forward, we, you know, hugs and kisses around.
Kevin Dennis (:And, oh, that's hard.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah
August Yocher (:Hey, keep your composure!
August Yocher (:Yeah, awesome.
Chris Thielen (:we get everybody seated, you know, and then the couple's just up there. And then I tell them now it's cruise control because then they can like I said, they can just kind of relax, they can just take a deep breath. And, you know, one of my things and I, you know, my side is personal wedding, that and that and the reason I call it that is just I love to do ceremonies that really personal to the couple. So that's a big, big thing for me, I want to nobody's there to hear me talk, they don't know me, you know.
August Yocher (13:8.622)
Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (:You guys have been to plenty of weddings, you know, where it's just kind of blah, blah, blah. You know, it's just, yeah, and I've been to a lot of weddings that way, where it's just like, they don't know each other, the guy just got a script, and he's gonna press play, and it's the same as it's ever been. And so I love to incorporate as much about the couple as we can. So I typically have, you know, some questions that I prompt couples to write out for me.
Kevin Dennis (:Yes, yeah.
Chris Thielen (:you how did you meet? How'd you fall in love? You know, what do you love about each other? What character qualities do you love? What's your favorite places to go? Trips that you've taken? How was the proposal? Those kinds of things. In fact, one of the things I love to do is, you know, just share a fun story that just kind of epitomizes who they are. You know, if they went on a trip and yeah, and then you want everybody saying, oh yeah, that's them. That's what we love about them. You know, and in my mind, yeah, sorry.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (14:3.718)
Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (14:3.894)
Mm-hmm. I like that.
Kevin Dennis (:It's, no, I was just gonna say, and you're the best at it, of everyone we work with. You really do take that moment at the very beginning, and it kinda, feel like it gets all the audience engaged, all the guests get really engaged into the ceremony. So you do kill it on that. Good job, Chris.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah. Well, and that's because it's a big part of my pre wedding thing. I, you know, as we meet, you know, usually I'll meet with couples once or twice, you know, typically over FaceTime or zoom and, and about we take time and want to walk them through that process. But then I really urge them to share their story. Sometimes, you know, toward the end, if they haven't written it yet, it gets tight, you know, because you got so many little vast minute details and it's fine. But most couples do. And I'll tell you one thing that I see too, is what as I'm sharing about
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (:you know how they fell in love and stuff. You can almost see them kind of, you know, because now they're engaged in their story. Yeah. And I tell them it's like, you know, if you're if you're flipping through the TV, sometimes in your favorite movie comes on. You've seen it 20 times, but you stop because you're like, Oh, I love this part, you know, and you're going to have audience members that know the story or they've seen it, but they love it. And to me, it just draws everybody in.
August Yocher (15:4.908)
Relax.
Kevin Dennis (15:5.820)
Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (:That's what you want. You want everybody sitting there going, Oh, I love these guys. I'm so glad I came, especially for people that have traveled out. You know, if they've traveled a long way, you might have aunts and uncles or whatever. They've never heard. And it's so fun to be able to share that story of how they met and fell in love and what makes them special. It makes it gives it all the romance, you know, you've got the romance built in, everybody's dressed up, everybody's, you know, the elegant, all that elegance there. But then it also gives it kind of that natural feel to all the
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (:the relational part that makes the wedding so special.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm But sometimes I think that's the part that gets lost is the romance of a wedding it because it gets so much Yeah, yeah the stretch and the details and you know the minutiae of all that just gets you know So the romance and the and why we're all here, you know, it gets lost sometimes so it you know, again That's good that you do that
August Yocher (16:3.886)
Cause the stress takes over.
Chris Thielen (16:6.896)
Yeah, yeah.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah.
Yeah, one of the taglines I have just kind of as I'm talking to couples and just even on my side is I, I tell them this is way more about your marriage than the wedding. I said that you this is way more about decades together than one good day. Because I would, you know, I tell them I said the goal is not to get married, anybody can get married. The goal is to have the 50 year anniversary party. Right? I mean, that's what that's what makes your love I mean,
August Yocher (:Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Mmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Yep.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (:Nobody sits at their wedding and thinks that they're not gonna make it for 50 years, but it's hard, know, know marriage is tough. And so being able to build it and focus on the relationship side of it that is the day to day, because that is really just one day in their entire story. It's a big one, but to be able to frame it that way and say, is one day in the decades that you're gonna have together. I think it helps perspective too, because if a...
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (17:0.152)
Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (17:0.303)
Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (:your brides feel like a bridesilla sometimes and there's just you know, all the minutiae and all the details and everything that collapses in on somebody when they're planning. I always remind them I'm like, you know, like you just said, Kev, you know, just remember why you're doing it. You know, you love each other. Don't don't get in fights about the details of the wedding. Forgetting you know why you're even getting Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Which happens. It happens so much. Yeah, it really does. And the parents. And then the parents get, you know, especially if, like, I just did a wedding last summer, but the parents were, like, freshly divorced. And so that, I mean, and that made it really rough. And at one point, I looked at the dad, I'm like, at one point, you got to suck it up and you're here for your daughter and you need to, you need to knock it off because you're making this day horrible for everyone. And this is about their love, not about how much you hate your ex-wife. You know, I was like, like,
Chris Thielen (:Wow, yeah.
August Yocher (:Oh no, yeah.
Chris Thielen (:Hmm.
August Yocher (:Hmm.
Chris Thielen (18:2.927)
Right? I know. Yeah.
August Yocher (18:3.404)
You think people would just put that aside though, you know? That's hard.
Chris Thielen (18:6.065)
Yeah, yeah, most do and I because my phone. Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (18:9.693)
I would say, yeah, 90 % do, but it's those 10 % that don't, yeah.
Chris Thielen (:I know. We've had it where you know somebody got mad at me because I didn't arrange the seating so he had to sit next to his ex wife and I had another one where he had the the poor. I know I was like I didn't decide that at all yeah. I had another dad we were at a park and and he you know he was upset he made the poor bride cry at a rehearsal because something about the mom and you know so yeah but but I tell couples you know hey if you're because my folks were split a couple years before I you know got married and and.
August Yocher (:Yeah.
August Yocher (:They're like, that's not mine. Problem.
Kevin Dennis (:No.
Kevin Dennis (:Oh
August Yocher (:No
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (:they played nice, most play nice together, because they see the bigger picture, you know, it's about the bride and groom. And I think that's one thing too, is I try to tell couples that as you're going into, you know, planning your wedding and everything, this is, it's your wedding, you guys get to craft it. And that's what's fun for me is to be able to craft it together. So I'll say, hey, here's your basic template. This is what a typical ceremony looks like. But none of this is set in stone. I always say,
August Yocher (:Yeah. Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (19:9.029)
No.
Chris Thielen (:We have a ring and a vow and a kiss and everything else is kind of negotiable, you But that way they feel, because some people are very creative with it and they want to add different things, you know, with Pinterest and seeing all the ideas that are out there, it's great. So I help them try to think about how we can incorporate those different parts into it. And what I've seen too is, you know, some of the nicer venues that we're at, you know, they're so gorgeous and you may have a grandma that's upset that the wedding isn't at the church or
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:You know, they have the expectations about the wedding was gonna be. And I always tell couples, it's like, don't worry about that. Almost every time that I've seen that, they'll come to these beautiful wedding venues, they'll see how happy you guys are, and then they're fine. You know, at the end, they're like, oh, that was really sweet, you know? And so they don't really hold on to a lot of that stuff. yeah.
August Yocher (:Hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
August Yocher (:They can be persuaded.
Kevin Dennis (20:0.901)
Well, and I think that was more 10 years ago, like 10 years ago. Yeah. And now people, because they were really holding on to the traditions, you know, grandma, you had to do it this way or whatever. And now I think parents and everyone's a little bit more open, you know, to, you know, weddings are very non-traditional now and, know, yeah.
Chris Thielen (20:3.749)
Right, I think you're right.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, but but we can incorporate some of the tradition just at a different venue. Yeah, that's what that's what we end up doing. Like if we, you know, if we've had it a lot where maybe grandma wanted it in the Catholic Church, you know, but the couple didn't want to have it there or something like that, you know, and I said, well, let's incorporate that in, you know, we could do a prayer, we could say, end it with our father, we could, we could do, you know, have something that we're different things that we're doing to kind of incorporate some of those elements in but yet, keeping it
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah, yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:at this venue and almost every time that they love it, grandparents, know, grandparents, wherever you have to go.
Kevin Dennis (:They really do. Yeah. And again, I feel like we've come a long way in 10 years. you know, if this was, if we were having this conversation 10 years ago, it'd be, you know, lot more fights and a lot more, you know. Oh, well, yeah. It was, it was not.
Chris Thielen (21:5.661)
Yeah. 25 years ago is even worse. you kind of to tread lightly on some of that stuff. But yeah, yeah.
August Yocher (:When you first began
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah, you really did. just you'd have to be in the yeah, was church or nothing. So
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, yeah. So it's fun. So yeah, and then after you know, the ceremony, you're saying what a typical day at the ceremony looks like, you know, at the end, you know, everybody claps all the time, you know, it's really fun. And they walk out. In fact, that's one of my things is I love I love an audience that's real, honestly, a little bit rambunctious, you know, I want an audience. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Because again, I work with kids. So sometimes you'll have an audience that's just real quiet. They're just kind of solemn and stuff. And it kind of
August Yocher (:Cheers. Yeah.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Oh no, it's more fun. Yeah.
August Yocher (:Oh yeah, it's the best vibes!
Chris Thielen (:creeps me out, know, because I'm like, come on everybody, you know, this is celebration.
Kevin Dennis (:It and it's funny.
August Yocher (:I'm Chris, because I always had this happen with me when I was coordinating was like, obviously meet with the couple a lot first, just the two of them. And then you get to know them a little bit and their vibe, their energy, their personalities. And then you get to the wedding. And sometimes it's a shock to me how the rest of the crowd is, right? Sometimes so quiet and you're like, whoa, I would not have expected that from this couple. Or they're just like crazy rambunctious, like you said. And you're like, wow, they're just...
Chris Thielen (:You
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, yeah.
August Yocher (:They're very shy. I'm just like surprised that the rest of their family has just a lot of energy. So I always thought that was funny.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah. Yeah, it's fine. so sorry, Kev.
Kevin Dennis (:No, I was just going to say, it's like you were saying how eerie it is. It's the same for like when we're doing like introductions or trying to get them to clap for people coming up for speeches and I'm getting like golf claps or I'm getting like just blank stares and it's like, it is creepy. It's not comfortable.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah. Yeah. Well, and I don't need the audience to make me feel comfortable. I just it's more like, you know, I what it is, I tell couples I said, you want a nice little blend of the two, like, you, you want the romance and the elegance that all the you know, the venues provide everybody being dressed, you that's kind of baked in, I think a lot of that elegance is baked in.
Kevin Dennis (:No, no, no, no, no.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:but then you also want it to feel natural because it is just the two, you know, it's a two of you guys, it's a love story, it's all of that. And so you, so that's why sometimes I, that's why I love to share their story, but sometimes we'll even, you know, share a little joke or something or just something to look, cause I think it's, it's a win if everybody at some point in the ceremony goes, aw, like that, because you shared something real sentimental or cute, but then also laughs a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And it just, to me, I, it's a win if the couple just feels like,
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:No, yeah, yeah. Or laugh. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, get some laughter in there as well, yeah.
Chris Thielen (:They take a deep breath. In fact, that's what I tell them all the time. said, when when dad gives you away and you take each other's hand, you walk up to the front. said, the first thing I want you to do is just take a deep breath, you know, and then hold hands, look at each other, say something to each other. Cause you know, especially if they haven't seen done a first look and haven't seen each other, that's a big moment, you know? And so for them to be able to just say hi or something, you know, then they just set someone on a path to really enjoy this.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (24:1.996)
Mmm! Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (:the time.
August Yocher (:Yeah. Well, and it seems like, Chris, you put a lot of care and effort, love into the preparatory part of the role that you have. I think we kind of want to know in the audience, too, what would you say is the biggest differences between hiring a professional officiant and just asking a family or friend to do it?
Chris Thielen (:Sure. Yeah. I think that well, I think that the difference is you need somebody who's used to being in front of a crowd and speaking. You know, I mean, I do that for a living. And so I'm and I've done it this thousands of times. So people ask, Well, are you do you get nervous, you know, right before as we're ready to walk out? Are you nervous? No, I don't, know, any more than anybody else would be nervous, you know, filling out a form if that's what they do all day. So no, that
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Yes.
August Yocher (25:1.535)
No, yeah.
Chris Thielen (25:6.107)
So you need somebody that's just natural that way. Also, I think what's important is you need somebody who can adjust on the fly. We've had a lot of different things, you know, that I'm sure, Kev, you know, the moments, in those moments when you're, you see something happening and you know, you know, because you've seen it right before the ceremony when you're like, oh wait, we gotta, oh, we gotta do this. And so being able to see things, yeah, to see things ahead of time and so they don't become a thing, you know.
Kevin Dennis (:Hmm.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Yeah, the wheels start turning.
Chris Thielen (:just little things like in the moment that we've had to adjust with some good friends and and I told them I said, you know, you got to have the rings in the box, you know, I was given the best man, if you've got one of the little ring boxes, put both rings in the box. And, and that way when he comes up, he presents and it's nice to pull it. You know, it's just a little detail, there's a certain way to hold your hands at the ring thing that makes it easy to remember because you know, your rights on their left and, you know, and it's just those little there's little
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (26:3.531)
And you'll see him, you'll see him question themselves sometimes.
Chris Thielen (26:6.522)
I know.
August Yocher (26:7.596)
And I would say too, like, oh, make sure you grab each other's rings, like not your own ring, because then that would be a thing too, right?
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, yeah, right, right, right. That's right. Yeah, or after the kiss, you know, getting out of the way, you know, you got to get out of the way. So the photo is not of you in the back. You know, and that's kind of weird. And, and, little things about spacing, like one of the things that's big for me is I'll tell couples, you know, I'm going to center myself on the aisle and the you know, if the arch or whatever is behind us. So when you when they walk up, sometimes they come and then they're off center.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:the
August Yocher (:Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:you know, and then I tell them, say, you guys gotta move this way, because otherwise their pictures are not composed properly. We're all off to the side, the video is not, it's off, you know. And so just being able to see those things ahead of time and or, you know, if the maid of honor forgets to take her bouquet, you know, it's like I'm giving her a wave, come on over, straighten the dress. And there's little, there's lots of little instructions that are important that if, know, you know how it is, I mean, if you've never done it.
August Yocher (:Mm.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (27:8.443)
Yeah. No. Yeah.
Chris Thielen (27:8.989)
it's not their fault. They just don't know. But it really is. And I think that, you know, if that one of the things I say is if people nobody's gonna remember your food, you know, nobody's gonna remember the flowers, you know, nobody's gonna remember the little these little little details, but they will remember if the ceremony was just awkward. You know, when you're like, Oh, dude, cringy. Yeah, and you've seen it. And I
August Yocher (:Yeah, no, I mean, that's true.
Kevin Dennis (:I've seen it many times. Yep.
Chris Thielen (:I've been to a few when it's cringy. Yeah.
August Yocher (:Or Chris, oh my gosh, so many times, like if it was a family friend, they would forget to tell people to sit down. And then everyone is standing during the ceremony and I'm in the back like, sit, everybody sit down. It's so awkward, it just sucks.
Chris Thielen (:Yes!
Kevin Dennis (:No.
Chris Thielen (:Right? Yeah. And so the unfortunate thing is, yeah, when those moments of awkwardness, you can't erase, I mean, it's there. And when that happens, that's what people remember. And you don't want people to remember your wedding as Oh, gosh, remember when that guy did, you know, said this or did that or didn't do that or he was, or you know, that the ceremony was five minutes long, or it was an hour and a half when it was supposed to be, you know, or they, so there's a lot of little and
Kevin Dennis (:Nope.
August Yocher (28:8.106)
Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:That, yeah.
Chris Thielen (:Of course, you guys know, this is true of every field that experience matters, you know, and so you pay for, know, Kevin, they hire you, they're paying for decades of knowing how to read a room, play the right songs, you know, get your equipment just right so that it works every time. And you're paying for the experience they're paying for the experience. You know, yeah, you could they have their cousin back there with a Costco speaker and a Bluetooth?
Kevin Dennis (:Yes.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Yep. Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:playing music, sure, sure, but that's what they're gonna remember. That's what people remember. So that's my thing is that, yeah, I mean, everybody will remember if it's awkward. And it's kind of one of those where they, if it's nice, they'll remember it, or if everything just goes well, they won't remember any of it. And that's probably a good thing. So the sports analogy, it's kind of like when you watch a game and you don't notice the officials, they've done a great job.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (29:4.251)
Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (29:4.600)
Yes.
August Yocher (:Yes.
Kevin Dennis (:100%. Yeah. No.
Chris Thielen (:Because it's not about the officials. It's about the players. And so I want to try to make it as much about the couple as we can. You know, not about me or you or the mic and, you know, August back there trying to direct traffic coordinating and stuff. So it's it. That's the big thing. I want to be personal and about the couple as much as possible. Yeah. Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah, that's a good way of doing it. just, yeah, I just see when they use friends, it's like gambling, you know, or family, you know, it really is because you're either it's either going to be really good, or it's going to be horrible. And there's and there's usually no in between, you know? Yeah, no. And it just you can tell the people that are doing it and that are really that were took it. Correct. Yeah, because they.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah.
August Yocher (:Yeah, I would agree with that.
Chris Thielen (:Right, right.
Chris Thielen (30:2.205)
.
August Yocher (30:4.952)
Take it seriously.
Chris Thielen (30:6.747)
Yeah, right.
Kevin Dennis (30:7.567)
You know, and I usually they're the ones I'm like I'm reminding them make sure you tell everyone to sit down because that's the one thing you forgot and they're writing it down and they're you know, and sometimes you'll say that and they're like, oh, yeah, and then oh, yeah I'll remember and they get up there and everyone's standing through the entire ceremony and it's just you know, and it's just like you said awkward and that's
Chris Thielen (:Yeah.
August Yocher (:Yeah.
Well, in that one story I told you, I just felt especially bad because this guy, he really was taking it seriously. He was such a sweet guy and he knew about the sitting down thing and we talked about it and I had mentioned to him, he's like, don't worry, I won't forget. And then he forgot and bro, when he came back up the aisle, he came to me and he's like, August, I forgot, I feel terrible. the fact that he just, he really didn't mean to, but it is just...
Kevin Dennis (:Ha ha ha ha ha!
Chris Thielen (:Yeah. Yeah.
August Yocher (:muscle memory, right? Your experience, like that's just not something you're going to forget. Like even though he went in with the best intentions, it still came out that way because it's just not, you know, it doesn't come to him like it has with someone with 25 years of experience.
Chris Thielen (31:7.739)
Yeah, I mean, that's the thing. Like, I can't imagine doing a ceremony where everybody's standing. It's so out of frame for me. I would be like, what's wrong? No, you guys. Yeah. And or getting out of the way of the kiss photo or, or getting the the order completely botched, you know, and and out of place or, you know, not being centered. I mean, it is it's one of those that you know, you know how that goes. It goes with anybody, anybody doing anything. It's like when you do it so many times, the repetition helps. And so
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah. Yeah.
August Yocher (:Yeah, you'd automatically be like, sit down.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:go. It really does.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, and I look at it, it's like, you know, a lot of the places we go, it's 10s of 1000s of dollars to get into these venues. And they're spending lots of money on stuff that nobody else will remember, to be honest with you, you know, and, the and something that they would remember is a couple hundred bucks, you know, and, and then they and then what I found also is that uncle or friend
Kevin Dennis (:Oh yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm. Yep.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Yeah.
Chris Thielen (32:0.644)
is so nervous, like you're saying like they want so bad for it to go well, but they're they're out of their league. They just don't know what to do. They've done it. It's and that's okay. And so they the whole night they're just nervous rather than being there to enjoy their friend's wedding. Yeah.
August Yocher (32:2.765)
Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (32:6.305)
Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (32:7.918)
Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:yeah, they'll come the next day like I didn't sleep or they're like, can you read the script again? I'm like, dude, you got it. Just like calm down a little bit, you know? So yeah, best intentions. But again, experience just beats it all. So
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, yeah
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, yeah. And just to be able to walk people through the process too. And because I'm, I'm, you know, we're meeting with couples nine or 10 months in advance. And, and I want them to say, you know, we meet, I always try to meet with a couple right away. So if I get an email, I'm like, hey, let's set something up next week. Let's just because I want to get to know them. I want them to know me, I want them to see that it's a good fit. And then before they even sign the contract or whatever. So typically, what I'll do is if somebody contacts me, yeah, well, I'll contact them as quick as I can.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (:Sometimes it's couple of days, but you know, whatever, just soon. And then try to set up a meeting with them, just mostly FaceTime and Zoom. And so, and it's 45 minutes or so. You know, it doesn't have to be too long, but what I'll do is I'll walk them through kind of the whole process. Because again, if you don't know what you don't know, it could be pretty daunting. You're like, I'll explain the license and the process of getting that. We'll explain what a typical ceremony looks like. We can go through who's gonna walk with who. You know, we can walk through what,
Kevin Dennis (33:8.401)
Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (:what I do versus what the venue coordinator does. And sometimes we'll talk about vendors, you know, and there was somebody last week I was talking to, they hadn't gotten a DJ, was like, you guys gotta use fantasy, you or, know, yeah, was like, he is. And so, you know, it's fun because when we show up and there's all the guys that know each other and we've worked together so much, it's just seamless. Oh gosh.
Kevin Dennis (:Hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Kevin!
Kevin Dennis (:It's so much more comfortable. It's so much more.
August Yocher (:My favorite day is when it's all like people I know preferred vendors. It just goes so smoothly.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, we're like it's a little all-star team and but we yeah, yeah I'm bad. I'm sorry
Kevin Dennis (:It's exactly we're back to sports again We we do chris and I really do get in trouble at weddings because we're over there in the corner talking about baseball morningly because Yeah, yeah
August Yocher (:You brought it up twice now, guys?
August Yocher (34:7.374)
just yapping.
Chris Thielen (34:9.744)
Well, and so, and that initial meeting then and so I want them to feel like they've, they feel good about, you know, the process and stuff. So I tell them, what I usually do is as soon as I get the email or whatever, I'll block that date in my calendar, if it's open, you know, I'll just I'll just dump it in there as kind of a soft hold. And then I'll meet with a couple and then they can decide if it's a good fit.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (:And then at that point, deposit and contract, and then that just kind of solidifies it. But I always let them know it's like the first couple that asked me for a date and I put it in there, they kind of get dibs. So that's one of the things I like to do. so that, you know, if it's, it got a thousand things going on, they're not always thinking contract immediately. So I just let them know it's like, I'm holding the date for you until I get somebody else, you know, and if it's been a month or two and somebody else asked me about that date, I'll always call that first couple and say, Hey, you know, do you still want to do it?
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Chris Thielen (35:1.937)
you do you still want to use me and you get dibs, that kind of thing. So, yeah.
Kevin Dennis (35:5.445)
Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (35:6.198)
Yeah. Well, that's another reason for just, you know, booking your vendors ASAP to, you know, securing that date.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah. Yeah, it's funny. I found that I'm one of the last ones usually. I don't know.
Kevin Dennis (:I know you are. Because sometimes all me with them and I'm like, they don't have a fit. need an official, you know, and then I refer them to you or, you know, it's like, let's get going, you know. And sometimes it's like they're a couple months out. I'm like, what are we doing?
August Yocher (:Interesting.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, yeah, I think
Oh yeah. Oh yeah.
August Yocher (:ceremony I feel is just the most important part, right? and, and the re and honestly, for vendors, I honestly love that you brought up earlier, like, this should be the least stressful part for the couple. Because it's funny, because it's the most stressful part for us. I think in my opinion, I think it's very like when I was coordinating, like, once the ceremony was done, I was like, okay, everything else is kind of smooth sailing. Now just there's so many little intricacies that go into it.
Kevin Dennis (:It's a reason why we're there.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:for the vendors. Oh, okay.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:Right.
August Yocher (36:3.234)
that, yeah, it's just, that's funny that you said that.
Kevin Dennis (36:6.055)
It's funny, being on the DJ side, I feel the same way. It's like once I get the music done and the microphone didn't have any interface, we got through and it's smooth. I exhale and the rest of it is just walking the park. Yeah.
August Yocher (:It just kind of does itself, you know, at that point, so.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, yeah. And that's, and that's the thing. That's why having somebody that can adjust even on the fly, because if something's not working, I've had it where a microphone's not working, or, you know, we've had it before where it's cutting out, or it's too windy and all that all that feedback coming through the Yeah, and then I'll just I'll look at the DJ and I'll take the mic off and I could just project, you know, I'll just project my voice out or they'll bring me a little handheld and we go that way. I mean, so that kind of thing is
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Totally.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm. Yep.
Chris Thielen (:to be able to do some adjust on the fly, I think is big. And that would be something where I think that the cousin or uncle would be have a really hard time because they wouldn't know, you know, how it's supposed to go, which is, know, again, just a couple hundred bucks is nothing when you're spending 10 to 1000. Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Oh, for sure.
Kevin Dennis (37:5.262)
No.
August Yocher (37:5.494)
It's really not. We always say that in wedding dollars, nothing.
Kevin Dennis (37:9.518)
I know I always say wedding dollars, it's not that much money. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I say that a lot. That's one of my things I say.
Chris Thielen (:Oh, wedding numbers, I like that. Yeah. Well, that's the thing. People will spend money on weddings that they would never spend elsewhere. And that's okay. That's good. Yeah. That's okay.
Kevin Dennis (:No, no.
August Yocher (:It's so strange.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah, they'll get the value meal at McDonald's, but yet they'll go spend, you know, buy Flamin' Yawn at the wedding, you know, kind of, you know, yeah.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that's great. But that's a once in a lifetime thing. You know, I tell couples that I'm like, Listen, you're doing this once, you know, we're not where you don't want to do this again. Right. And so, you know, let's make it special. And let's make it something that's memorable and something that they can relax and their friends and family can like, they don't have to stress about. And, you know, it does, it is worth it. It's it's a value add, I think that way, it just to feel like
Kevin Dennis (:No, that's yeah.
August Yocher (:Yeah, the YOLO brain comes on.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:Okay, that little thing, that one part is just taken care of. don't have, I could check it off my list. And that's a big thing too. So like for me, I tell couples in that initial meeting, we'll go over things, you know, and, but I tell them, like, hey, any amount of contact you need from me in the next nine or 10 months, just call or text me in the middle of the day, sometimes I'm working on something in my job and then I get a text for a wedding. I'm like, oh, wedding.
we got a wedding text, you know, and it's fun, you know, it's just kind of fun for me. It's a nice break. And but again, I love working with young couples, because I've worked with teenagers and kids for 30 years. And so a lot of the people so old I am, but a lot of the people getting married now I knew I was with their generation as kids, you know, and that's why I'm doing I'm doing weddings for for, you know, their adults now but they were I knew him as kids.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah. Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah, I know.
Chris Thielen (:And so it's a lot of fun for me. I feel like I kind of understand the generation. I want them to feel like they could just contact me about anything. And I'll, you know, cause I'll explain the license or something. And it's a bit of a process. And I'll just say, listen, you're going to forget everything I just said. when it's within 90 days of the wedding and you have to go get your license, just call me again and I'll refresh you and we'll go through the process again, just so you don't have to worry about it. know, so.
August Yocher (:really like how you connect your two passions because they kind of do go hand in hand, right? Like, just working with kids and then kind of, or like a rambunctious chaotic group and just kind of applying it to something else that you enjoy. I think that's really cool.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah. Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah. Well, I joke with couples. say, you know, I don't mind the chaos like at the rehearsal and stuff like that, because I joke like groomsmen are just fourth graders that can shave. That's really the only difference. You get a group. You get a you get a group of five or six, you know, 28 year old dudes together that are buddies from childhood. Oh, there's you're not going to stop them from goofing around. And but I'm in on it. I love it because then we can we can poke at the groom, you know, and
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah, true.
August Yocher (:truest thing ever said
August Yocher (40:0.683)
Yeah.
Chris Thielen (40:0.732)
or the mind and it's just it's like a family reunion in a lot of ways. So it should be that way. It's it's fun. So yeah.
Kevin Dennis (40:6.001)
Yeah, I agree. All right, as we get ready to start wrapping things up, I kind of wanted to ask you, are there any common mistakes that couples make when planning their wedding that they could avoid?
Chris Thielen (:Uh, yeah, one is waiting too long to book efficient because because that well, that's a bit I've even in the last couple weeks, I've had to turn down several because I'm just already booked. And so I typically book, I'd say nine, 10 months in advance. You know, I've got some I've got one booked for August, October, November, you know, one, I just got one for December. I haven't really started booking for 26 yet.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah, fair. So not getting what you want. Yeah.
August Yocher (:Wow.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (:but I've got probably 20 at least on the board for this the rest of this year, 25 probably. And then I'll get some, know, that are more a little more last minute, which is okay. So I think yeah, waiting too long, because it's easy to get the, you know, once you get the venue and you know, you have your date, you know, just it just a quick call, like that's the thing, they'll think it's gonna take forever. It really doesn't just even just just call or text me email, whatever. And then, then I'll just hold the date, you know, even if we
Kevin Dennis (:Wow.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
August Yocher (:Well yeah, and I looked at your site, Chris, you have email and phone number right there, so it's like very easy to get ahold of you, so.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, I try to look every day, you know, sometimes I mean, texting, I'm like everybody else. That's a medium to call me, just call me and I'll get back right away. Texting too. So but the email is there's a little bit more of a trail. That's probably better. And but yeah, even if we don't set up our meeting for another month, at least you've gotten on my calendar, you know, or at least I can say I can say, yeah, I'm free that day. And let me block the date for you that kind of thing. So
August Yocher (:Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, I think that's a common mistake. Another one I think is is majoring on the minors. You know, sometimes I think couples will go in and they'll think that this these particular decorations or this particular little you know, little little things that really are are very small in the grand scheme of your wedding day. They put a lot of effort into it. Some of the bigger things they just kind of let slide. And so there are some majors, you know,
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Mm.
Chris Thielen (:booking those vendors right away, getting the ones that you want and are more important than the favors, you know, or the choices of wine or whether you know what hats are gonna be the photo booth. Yeah, the colors, what hats are gonna be in the photo booth. mean, stuff like that. just doesn't, those are just such small things that you'll wish you would have, you know, there's the old illustration of, you know, if you got a jar,
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
August Yocher (:The napkin fold.
Kevin Dennis (:Or the color.
Chris Thielen (:and you got different size rocks, you always put the big rocks in first, you know, and then the small, then all the way down and then you pour the sand and then you put the, so because you wanna get those big rocks done first. I think that's a common.
Kevin Dennis (:Hmm.
August Yocher (:I like that analogy, yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah, I do too. So, cool.
Chris Thielen (43:1.595)
So yeah, but I like I said, I love it. It's so fun for me. And I'm local. And so it's easy for me, you know, just lot of the weddings that I do are in Livermore, pleasant in area or just, you know, but I'll travel a little bit. Sometimes if I'll go if it's Napa or San Jose, I'm not able to make the rehearsal. But, you know, August, I mean, most of the time, yeah, most of the time, the web, the venue coordinators running it.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah, and understandable. Yeah.
August Yocher (:Mm.
Yeah, I don't I think whenever I had you, you were always at the rehearsal, but it was local as well, too. So.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, there's times that I'll go and, and they're like, Why are you here? You know, because they don't expect the efficient's usually to go. Yeah, sometimes. Yeah, but but I like to if I can. But I, that's a big thing for me is I just try to make the process simple. I that's a big thing. I just want to make it as stress free as possible because there's so many other things. I mean, just about everybody getting married now that they've got their careers, you know, they're in their careers.
August Yocher (:Really? Interesting.
Chris Thielen (:They've gotten, there's both careers. And so they're managing that, they're managing planning the wedding. You know, we just don't need to make some of the things that should be kind of easy, all that difficult. So, yeah, yeah.
August Yocher (44:8.152)
Don't complicate it.
Kevin Dennis (:And that'll be our tip. Don't complicate it.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, yeah, you keep it simple, stupid, right? That was the old thing. So, so yeah, I mean, I like I said, I would love to, know, any of your couples that are that are looking, I would love to just have them check out the site. just personal wedding.net. And, you know, there's a lot of there's other resources on there. So like, if they want to write their own vows, I've just some things on there for that. There's different readings on there. I'll say this too, if they if you've got couples that
August Yocher (:Chris. No, yeah, yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm.
Chris Thielen (:have if they really, you know, want their uncle or cousin or whoever to do it. I've offered this in the past two if if they want to just if they can call me, you know, they can I if you want to use somebody else that's close to you and your family. I don't mind talking with somebody and just walking them through the process. You know. Well, you may know Robbie rich, right? You know, Robbie? Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (45:1.051)
Mmm, that's very generous of you.
August Yocher (45:2.850)
That's very sweet.
Kevin Dennis (45:6.405)
Yes. Yeah.
August Yocher (45:6.700)
We love Robbie!
Chris Thielen (45:7.805)
Yeah, right. He's my guy. He's my buddy. And so he's DJ that does that a lot. But then he, he was doing one for a family. And I said, dude, just call me and let me walk you through. Here's how you do a rehearsal. Here's how you do. And he knocked it out of the park, you know, so I don't mind doing that, too. So that that's just, just because I want everybody to have the wedding that they want to have. And
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah, yeah.
August Yocher (:Yeah.
August Yocher (:Well, that speaks volumes, Chris, because that just means like you genuinely really care and you really love what you do if you have, yeah, just a generous heart like that.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:Well, appreciate that. But it's but it's true. I really do want I would hate for somebody to have that awkward moment. And I'm like, Well, you didn't hire me. So you know, I'm not looking for that, you know, if it because it is special. Sometimes if you have somebody a family member doing it, then, yeah, gosh, don't don't let them wait in this sea of confusion about what they're supposed to do. Just call me. It's okay. I don't I don't mind taking some time.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
August Yocher (:Yeah. Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (46:3.579)
Yes, I agree. All right, so before we wrap up, we always like to ask our guests what is their favorite part of a wedding, and you can't say ceremony, so we're going to ask you your favorite part outside of the ceremony of a wedding.
Chris Thielen (:Okay.
Chris Thielen (:Oh wow.
Yeah, I think sometimes the initial meeting is a lot of fun. So the FaceTime, you know, when we first get together, just getting to know a couple, you know, everybody's a little different, but just hearing their heart about what they want in their wedding, and just kind of getting to know them and then being able to be creative and say, Okay, well, we're going to craft it to be to be this way to match your vibe to match your family to match how you guys got together. And so to see the variety that that
Kevin Dennis (:Mm.
Mm-hmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Mm-hmm.
August Yocher (:Mm-hmm.
Chris Thielen (:there is between all the different couples. But then yeah, sometimes that initial meeting because I'm just a people person. So it's fun to meet new people, you know, and like I said, it's always and it's always a happy moment, you know, so we're not planning a funeral or something, you know, we're planning away, you know, and so to be able to plan something that's so big and so fun, together and do that by meeting new people is a lot of fun for me. So yeah. All right. That's outside the ceremony, Kev. How's that? Okay, all right. All right.
Kevin Dennis (:I agree.
No, is. Yeah. No, no.
August Yocher (47:2.276)
Yeah
Kevin Dennis (:Love it. Love it. All right. So no, no, that that works. That works. I just had to keep it because I knew you were going to say ceremony. anyway. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. All right. So, Chris, one more time, tell us how to get in or the listeners to get in contact with you.
August Yocher (:Very good, very good.
Chris Thielen (:Oh, you're right. Well, I already kind of gave it away. That moment when the doors open and you see the bride and dad coming up, that one, that's big.
August Yocher (:Yeah, yeah.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, website is personal wedding.net. My phone and just my cell is on there. My email's on there. The email is just chris at personal wedding.net. Pretty easy stuff. so yeah, I've got an Instagram. try, I try to upload pictures. Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:Simple.
Kevin Dennis (:You're doing pretty good.
August Yocher (:I wanted to say too, Chris, I just love your little tradition of always getting a picture with the couple. Like, you always, like, made a point, like, I'll wait in line. I'll get a photo with them, you know? Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah.
Kevin Dennis (48:0.269)
Yeah
Chris Thielen (48:0.798)
like, Oh, you her wedding in: August Yocher (:Mmm.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah, isn't that awesome? Yeah.
Chris Thielen (:and camera roll and look as oh yeah, you know, so, so yeah, that's that's fun. So I do try to keep I'm not as as I'm an old dog. So I'm trying to keep keep my Instagram a little bit updated, but not as much but you can see on there somebody goes I think it's just personal underscore wedding, underscore by underscore Chris, something like that. I don't know. I think I probably need to put it on the website. I don't know if I have the link there. yeah.
Kevin Dennis (:And luck.
Kevin Dennis (:for it.
Kevin Dennis (:Yeah.
Well, August will have all this in the show notes and on the website that goes out. We'll have all that on there for you as well. So couples can find you really quickly. So all right, Chris, more than a pleasure. we only mentioned, I think we mentioned sports two or three times August where you keep a track.
Chris Thielen (:Yeah, yeah, so. Yeah, always.
Yeah.
August Yocher (49:8.622)
Well then you said like major and minor and that to me felt like a sport.
Kevin Dennis (:Okay.
Chris Thielen (:I don't know if that counts, I don't know. I don't know if you can put that one on the scoreboard, August. Yeah. Well, what a joy you guys. Thank you so much. It's a joy just to talk with you guys and your audience too. we'll see each other soon, I'm sure, at a real live wedding.
August Yocher (:sports thing.
Kevin Dennis (:No, no, yeah, there you go. There you go. So, all right.
August Yocher (:It was great having you.
Kevin Dennis (:For sure. All right, folks, thank you for listening to another episode. And now that I'm engaged, how do I get married? We'll see you next time.
Chris Thielen (:Bye everybody.
